


in the waiting

by maki_senpai



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied Character Death, Modern Royalty, Very Brief Mention Of Violence, blacksmith alisa, its a reincarnation au so, kindergarten teacher alisa, miwa-centric, not too major character death but im tagging it just in case, princess miwa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 18:29:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29937597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maki_senpai/pseuds/maki_senpai
Summary: When life doesn't work out the first time, you just have to hope the next one does.To hope that old feelings resurface after being preserved for so long.To hope that the new life will have you meet the one you love again.
Relationships: Haiba Alisa/Kageyama Miwa
Kudos: 1
Collections: Haikyuu WLW Bang





	in the waiting

Miwa sits straight in her seat at the high table, lips pursed, arms crossed, eyebrows knitted together in frustration. She tries to block out the conversation around her, but the task proves difficult when the discussion revolves around the future she doesn’t want. She looks across the table and sees her brother stare at the table like it held answers. Miwa flicks her gaze to her parents, the king and queen, their conversation heated, talking animatedly. 

“...a marriage with the Seijoh kingdom is far more beneficial for us than a marriage with Shiratorizawa.”

“Sure, but Shiratorizawa has more solid soldiers and trade routes. They have better resources and have a better foundation in terms of riches. Seijoh is a self-made kingdom, with much less to offer!”  
  
“Exactly! And with our foundation and riches and power that we have over Seijoh, they’ll have no choice but to go with _our_ terms. It’ll be easier to bend them to what we want and need, getting more out of them than we could with Shiratorizawa. They’re more flexible, will give us what we want and strengthen not just their kingdom, but ours especially. Do you see where I’m coming from?” 

Miwa rolls her eyes, even though she has no say in all this, she agrees with her mother with that argument. But, she wishes there was a different way to get the alliance without using marriage to seal it. _Her_ marriage. She scoffs. 

“Seijoh it is. We’ll contact the Grand King right away.” She hears her father say. 

“How does that sound, sweetie?” Her mother turns to her. 

_What difference does it make asking me?_ She wants to answer. Instead, “Just great, mother. Though I don’t think my opinion hardly matters.” Her tone was bitter and if her parents noticed, they didn’t say anything about it, just Tobio looking up and giving her a worried look. She smiles at him warily and excuses herself from the high table and heads to her chambers. 

Miwa sits by her windowsill, looking out at the expanse of land her family owns. The greens of the hills, the blue of the distant ocean, the crows that fly freely across the skies, the colourful flowers from what little she could see of the garden. She sighs, creating a little fog on the window where her breath hit. She didn’t necessarily have a bad life, nor was she ever unhappy when she was a child. 

But more often than not, she wished she wasn’t born a royal. She wanted to be free and choose her own path in life. Sure, she liked the privilege she gets from being a royal, but it could only get her so much. Miwa would rather have the privilege of being free from her duties, be free to marry someone she actually knows and loves. She doesn’t like the fact that she’s being used as an object of transaction. She’s more than the princess of Karasuno, more than just a pretty face. She had her own talents, she was skilled in archery and sword fighting, she was smart and good at negotiating, diplomatic when it matters. Her scholars often told her how she’d make a fine queen that would run her own kingdom and how her opinions were far beyond that of past kings and queens; including her own parents. 

Miwa wished they saw that too, but to them, she’s just their daughter and a princess who has duties to uphold, making sure that their kingdom remains powerful. To them, she was a pawn in their game of thrones, a game of power and riches.

She thinks a lot about what her life would have been like if she were born in a modest family. Would she be doing what she wanted? Would she be able to find a spouse on her own? One that wasn’t arranged for her? Would she have been able to choose her own path? Miwa sighs again and pads over to her bed, plopping herself on it, face first.

She opted to have dinner in her room, not wanting to deal with the things her parents might drill into her head and nag her about the arrangements for the courting process, meeting the Grand King, getting acquainted and everything else in between. She wanted to have what little piece of solitude she had left before she fully surrenders her life to the hands of a stranger. Despite the full meal she had, she felt empty and hollow. Suffocated and restrained. 

She needed to escape. 

* * *

Miwa often snuck out of the palace in her free time. Sometimes Tobio would come along and they’d roam the streets of their kingdom, stripping away their titles and just be amongst their people. The pair have mastered the art of stealth and used it whenever they could. Miwa snuck out the most though, and tonight was one of those nights where she just wanted to forget who she was. She waited for the sun to shine its final rays of light before getting into more comfortable garments that would blend in enough with the common folk. She wrapped a loose scarf over her head, mostly to conceal the signature raven hair that was unique to the royal family. Sure, there were dark haired people in the kingdom, but the Kageyamas were darker than normal, like crows feathers, resembling obsidian rather than charcoal. 

The princess weaved her way through the secret passageways around the palace, exiting undetected and sprinted across the courtyard and out of palace grounds. She slowed to a jog, and eventually walked, her simple blue dress swaying with the evening breeze as she did so. She reached the shopping district, walking by shops that opened till late, watching merchant stalls put away their things for the day. The marketplace still bustled with life, the smell of fresh fruits filling the air. The people were laughing about, talking to their regular patrons, whispering about dangerous rumours, friends walking side by side and just being _free_. She envied them like they envied her for her status. 

She continued her solo walk until she got to the industrial district. That part of town closed earlier than the others, but they also did open earlier, so Miwa was a little bit surprised when she heard a distant clanging echoing in the street. It had been a while since she last snuck out, but she was pretty sure the district still ended their days early. Curious, she walked towards it until it got louder and found herself in front of the blacksmith’s shop she swore was not there two months ago. 

From the window, she could see sparks fly from the sword being hammered to perfection until she looked in further and _felt_ the sparks fly. A woman about her age was there, working away at the weapon she was so dutifully dealing with. She was breathtakingly gorgeous, despite the dirt from working decorating her face, her platinum blonde hair was up in a messy bun, her striking green eyes full of concentration. She must’ve felt Miwa’s gaze on her as she looked up from her work and right into Miwa’s eyes. Her features were gentle and kind, even more so when she offered a friendly smile. It took a moment for Miwa to collect herself and realize she was still staring when she gave a nervous smile back. The other only smiled bigger and gestured for her to come in. 

Miwa pushed the door open, immediately smelling the metal and ember that enveloped the shop. 

“Hello!” The woman greeted, her voice as cheery and kind as she looked. It made Miwa’s stomach flip for some reason. 

“Hi, sorry for intruding.” 

“Oh! Not at all, if anything, I should apologize for making noise during after hours. I get so carried away sometimes.” She was shy and sheepish. It was adorable. 

“I’m Alisa Haiba, by the way! My family and I own this shop. I’d shake your hand but I’m pretty dirty right now.” She giggled nervously. 

“That’s okay. I’m Miwa Ka- I’m Miwa.” 

“No need to hide your highness, I can tell who you are.” She smiled and Miwa blushed. 

“Right. Um… did your family just move here? I don’t… remember seeing this shop before.” 

“Yeah! We recently moved here from a very far away part of the world to escape war. It was getting pretty bad so we left and decided to start a life here.”

“Oh, sorry to hear that.” 

“It’s no bother, really. I always wanted to come here after hearing so much about the kingdom.”  
  
“Well, I hope you enjoy life here.” 

“Thank you!”   
  
“So… do you always work this late?” 

“Not often. I just get really into it sometimes and don’t notice the time.”

“Ah. Are you… liking it here so far?” Why was Miwa suddenly so bad at talking? 

“I am! Everyone is really kind and friendly. Very welcoming. Especially the Hinatas from the bakery.”

“Ah, yes. They’re literal balls of sunshine.”

“Yeah. I really like it here. It’s far different from what it was like back home. I don’t have to be scared here all the time or be cautious of who I talk to. No sounds of fighting every night, or fires around the neighbourhood. Sorry, didn’t mean to darken the mood there.”

“It’s okay, tell me more?”   
  
Alisa’s face seemed to light up and Miwa listened as Alisa talked about her life in her old home, she talked about her family and how they were. Her passion in smithing, how she doesn’t care if it was a “man’s” job. Then Alisa asked Miwa about her life in the palace and she couldn’t help but be honest with her. She hadn’t really talked to anyone about how she really felt besides Tobio; how she didn’t like that her life was written out for her. It just seemed so easy to be so honest and open with Alisa. She felt a kind of comfort she didn’t know she needed. She listened intently just as Miwa did with her and soon it was going well past the evening as they continued to talk about themselves, trading stories about their childhood and their likes and dislikes. 

It was nice and refreshing and Miwa felt a little bit more liberated. 

“Ah, it’s getting late. I should head back before anyone notices I’m gone.” 

“Okay. Will I see you again?” 

The question made Miwa blush, “Yes.” 

“Good! Maybe you could show me around next time.” 

“It would be my pleasure.” 

* * *

It had been a week since Miwa met Alisa. 

She meant to come back the next day, and the next, and the next, but royal responsibilities held her back from doing so. She just hoped the other didn’t think she was avoiding her or that she didn’t want to see her again, because she did. She really, really wanted to see Alisa again. 

Miwa finally found her opportunity when she was dismissed from the day's meetings and arrangements to rest for the Grand King’s arrival the next day. As soon as she got to her quarters, she changed into commoner’s clothes and asked Tobio to cover for her if anyone asks where she is. It was a little bit after noon when she slipped out of the palace. She took the shortcuts that led to the industrial district and finally found Alisa’s shop. 

“Hi! Welcome!” A tall, lanky boy, no older than Tobio greeted Miwa upon her arrival. Must be Alisa’s brother. She smiled at him. 

“Is uh… Is Alisa here?” 

“Oh! Yeah, I can go get her.” 

“Thank you.” 

The boy disappeared further into the shop, leaving Miwa to look around, admiring the fine weaponry that hung on the walls. They were nothing like the weapons in the palace. These were made so meticulously, each blade forged to perfection despite the cheaper metal. She picked up a dagger, the grip wrapped in green-dyed leather, the silver pommel encasing a simple emerald that shone in the light, its crossguard was engraved with intricate designs that spread out like branches. The outer face of the blade itself sported a similar design. It was beautiful and felt good in Miwa’s hands. It was well-balanced and light, just like how she preferred. The matching sheath was a simple black leather with green accents; a perfect set in Miwa’s eyes. 

“That one’s my favourite.” A soft voice behind her said. She smiled to herself before facing Alisa. 

“It’s beautiful.”

“It’s the first thing I made when I got here.”

Miwa looked at the dagger once more as the light from outside shone on it just right. She could just imagine how hard Alisa worked on it, knowing how much dedication was put into forging the weapon. 

“Keep it.” Alisa said simply.

“What? No, I can’t! It’s… you worked so hard on it.”

“And I want you to have it! Besides, I can just make more.” 

“May I at least pay for it? Any price.” 

“That defeats the purpose of it being a gift, don’t you think?” 

Alisa’s tone was playful and the smile that accompanied her words made Miwa’s stomach erupt in butterflies. 

“...Thank you, then. Would you like to walk around town?” 

“I would love to! And oh! Here, for the dagger. You can keep it strapped onto your thigh, keeping it hidden under your clothes.” 

Alisa handed her the strap and Miwa shyly took it, working it under her dress and around her thigh, not caring if anyone saw, and secured the dagger. It felt surprisingly comfortable, like it’s not even there. She mumbled another thanks and led Alisa out the shop. 

Alisa was a little taller than she was, Miwa noticed, as they walked side by side along the narrow streets of town. She talked animatedly while Miwa observed her. She looked impossibly beautiful with her face clear of any dirt and made simple clothes look elegant on her. Her hair was loose this time around, long locks cascading down her back, bangs framing her face just right. Miwa glanced away before she got caught staring again and refocused her attention on whatever Alisa was saying. Something about metals and such. 

They continued to walk around, Miwa pointing out notable places and restaurants that would be worth her visit should she venture out on her own. When dinner time rolled around, Miwa dragged Alisa into a tiny family restaurant she loved as a child. She was delighted when the other said how much she liked the food there, even enthusiastically asking the chef for the recipes. Afterwards, they walked along the shoreline by the fisherman’s wharf, letting the tide lap at their feet as they admired the sunset that started to close in.

“If you were in my position, what would you do?” Miwa asked solemnly as she watched the sun slowly sink. 

“Hard to say, to be honest. I know I’d want to do whatever I can to make sure my kingdom will thrive and keep its power, but at the same time, I value my free will.” 

Miwa hummed, kicking at the tide. 

“What if you fell in love with someone who wasn’t the one you’re supposed to marry?” 

“I’d choose them over anything, I think.” 

“Even if the kingdom is at risk?”

“Most likely. I love them, right?” Alisa answered easily and Miwa wondered if she could decide like that. Not even thinking about the consequences. 

She wondered if she’d even find anyone to love before she was married off.

* * *

Days and weeks had passed and Miwa’s visits to town became frequent. There are days where Miwa would even sneak Alisa into the palace. Sometimes they’d spar using wooden swords, go around the library trading knowledge on literature they’re familiar with. But what they did most of the time on palace grounds was to walk aimlessly around the vast garden. They especially liked it at night when the fireflies would show up and illuminate the scene. Those moments felt like they were the only people in the world. 

It was nice and even though the moments were fleeting, their feelings remained. 

With their walks around town becoming a norm, the people became acquainted with the pair, always greeting them and having some sort of collective agreement to stay quiet about their princess sneaking away from the palace. Sometimes though, they’d hear whispers about them above whispers of danger, about their lingering touches, about the way they look at each other, the soft smiles they share as if there was some secret meaning beneath them. 

They ignored them, however, too lost in their own conversations as they navigated the streets seamlessly. Miwa ranting about the courting season, Alisa raving about a stronger, cheaper metal imported from who knows where, and everything else they could possibly think of. It was so easy for them to get lost in each other’s presence, basking in the comfort and companionship they bring to one another. 

Miwa tossed and turned in her bed as she thought about it more- as she thought about Alisa more, wondering what the feeling she got was whenever she would accidentally graze her hand, or how her skin burned pleasantly whenever Alisa lay a hand on her. She wondered if it was normal to want to feel impossibly close to her, to want to know what would be like if she hugged her, kissed her, held her until daylight. She wondered if it was love.

Meanwhile, in town, Alisa questioned the same, except she was _sure_.

When they met up the next day, something in the air was different. There was a pleasant kind of tension that was hard to ignore and Miwa’s late night thoughts kept repeating itself in her head. It wasn’t until a week later that they acknowledged it. 

They walked along the palace gardens as they’ve done so often at night, pinkies locked together with light blushes on their faces. They got onto the swing situated in the middle of the maze-like garden, where the roses were intertwined with the chains. They sat quietly at first, looking up at the clear, night sky, watching the stars sparkle about. It was like a calm before a storm. Peaceful, yet something was looming, dangerous or not. The feeling of anticipation was there, but for what, Miwa wasn’t sure. But the silence was nice, so she didn’t mind. 

She spared a glance at Alisa, whose face was redder than she thought was possible. It was then that she realized that their fingers were intertwined, not daring to let go anytime soon. 

“Miwa… when I got here, I didn’t really expect to be so close to the princess.” She chuckled, looking down at her lap, her free hand playing with the hem of her blouse. Miwa squeezed the hand she was holding, her eyes never leaving Alisa. 

“I didn’t think I’d be close to anyone outside the castle, really.” Miwa retorted, a teasing tone in her voice. 

“Coming here, I didn’t really think about finding a… a partner. Someone to be with, you know? I didn’t expect to fall in love just yet. But I did.” 

Alisa turned her head and looked right into Miwa’s eyes. 

“Oh.” 

“Now, I didn’t really have expectations, but I really hoped it wasn’t you. And yet, it is. I just… you’re bound by responsibility and I knew that… we’d be impossible from the moment I realized I loved you. I also knew that relationships like these are unconventional and frowned upon. I knew that loving you came with a price, that it would hurt because you’re betrothed, set to marry King Tooru. I knew all that, and yet I still love you. My heart still chose you and I needed to tell you that.”

Miwa just stared, her mouth slightly parted as she let the words sink in. What was she to say to that? Especially seeing the unwavering confidence in Alisa’s eyes, how she was so _sure_ despite what her feelings entailed. 

“You don’t have to say anything. I just wanted you to know because I learned the hard way that some things need to be said before it’s too late. You just make me so unbelievably happy. Your smile, your laugh… everything. You make my heart race and my stomach does a whole summersault whenever you’re near. You’re beautiful inside and out and I really can’t think of reasons why I shouldn’t love you, despite the obvious things that are out of our control.”

Miwa wanted to say something. Anything. Because she knew now that she felt exactly the same. But the words were caught in her throat and she was frozen. She wanted to shout out and tell her that she loves her too, that she would risk it all for her, that she would choose her over everything. 

_“What if you fell in love with someone who wasn’t the one you’re supposed to marry?”_

_“I’d choose them over anything, I think.”_

_“Even if the kingdom is at risk?”_

_“Most likely. I love them, right?”_

Was it that easy? To just drop everything? 

She still needed to say something. Or maybe she didn’t. 

Without any thought, Miwa leaned forward, bringing her free hand up to cup Alisa’s face, tilting her head slightly, pressing their lips together softly. For a moment they were still, but soon, Alisa melted into the kiss and let go of Miwa’s hand in favour of wrapping her arms around her waist. The kiss was gentle, yet needy, as if Miwa was conveying everything she wanted to say into the action. It was heated, yet comfortable and innocent. Their lips moved naturally, fitting together like they were made for each other. When they pulled away, they leaned their foreheads together and laughed, holding each other, afraid to let go. They stayed that way for a while, letting everything that happened take root and settle.

“We could leave, you know?” Alisa whispered between them. Miwa pulled back slightly, taking in the flushed state of the woman she loves. 

“We could, yeah. Start a simple life together. Escape to a place where nobody knows us. I escaped the palace enough without being noticed anyway.” 

Alisa giggles. “I could open my own shop, or we could find land and farm. You could teach since you’re so smart.” 

“I’d love that.”

“Let’s do it.” 

The look in Alisa’s eyes became more determined and sure, letting Miwa know how sincere and how much she wants that life. How could she say no?

“Let’s meet here in three days at this time, rain or shine and we’ll go.”

“Really? But what about-”

“Really. I want that life with you. I never liked this one anyway. I know where we can run off to. Three days, Alisa.” 

“Okay.” 

“Promise?” 

“I promise.” 

Miwa kissed Alisa once more, this time more desperate and needy. A seal of the promise they made. 

* * *

“What do you mean I’m leaving?!” Miwa yells, pacing back and forth in front of the king and queen who just watched her with exasperated faces. 

“The council from Seijoh insisted that they do the final preparations in their kingdom and then from there, your marriage will take place. Besides, it’s easier that way and you’ll have time to settle in and be acquainted with your new home.”  
  
This was _not_ supposed to happen. 

“It’s for the best, Miwa. We already have your things packed. Up to you to bring whatever else you may want or need. The carriage for the port leaves in two hours, so be ready by then. 

“I don’t want to do this.” Miwa said, voice laced with venom. She was shaking. Two hours? She wouldn’t even have time to tell Alisa and they were due to fulfill their promise in a day and a half. This was absolutely not supposed to happen. 

“Oh, don’t be so childish, dear. Don’t make us drag you out. Tobio will be with you until the wedding though, so it’ll be okay.” 

In a blink of an eye, she was in a carriage with Tobio attempting to comfort her. She should’ve fought harder, should’ve resisted and ran right away. But she didn’t. She froze until her brother had to gently pull her into the carriage. Then, she was on the ship before the reality of things really started to settle in. She didn’t even get to say goodbye, or explain to Alisa why she broke their promise. Miwa felt helpless and honestly so lost. She wanted to be free and not be confined in the walls of royalty, to be chained to the responsibilities that came with her family name. 

But life, it seems, is cruel and unfair. 

When they arrived at Seijoh, they were greeted warmly and met with such great hospitality. If she were any other person, she would’ve appreciated it more and maybe even like where she ended up in. But her heart isn’t present and she only felt worse, her thoughts only drifting back to the woman she left behind.

* * *

To be honest, Miwa should be thankful that she ended up with King Tooru and not any other king or prince. He was actually nice and considerate, even understanding why she was so withdrawn and cold. It’s not like he wanted this either. A drunken confession in their shared chambers one night revealed that he loves another, but cannot act on it for the sake of his people and kingdom. In turn, she talked to him about Alisa and what they were and how she felt, how she was supposed to run away with her and start over, finally having the life she always dreamt of. They became friends after that, bonding over the mutual misery of their failed love lives. It made the arrangement easier on them both, being able to tolerate and have boundaries with each other, being open and honest. 

It had been a week and a half since Miwa had arrived at Seijoh, acquainting herself with how things work around the palace and kingdom with the help of Tooru. He saw to it that he showed her things himself since they’d have their time together and just rant about how unfair life has been to them. He needed the release just as much as she did, letting out their frustrations in the archery range, angrily shooting their arrows at the poor sacks of grain like it personally caused their equal misery. 

She had attempted to write letters to Alisa as Tooru encouraged her to do. She had sent three so far, all of which were left unreplied. She assumed that Alisa was angry at her, which she understood, but still it stung. Though watching Tooru and Hajime, his royal guard and man he loves, interact and act like there’s nothing between them was even worse. She could see the longing and pain in their eyes and just thought herself lucky that she didn’t have to see a pained expression on Alisa’s features. Miwa was sure that she wouldn’t be able to bear it. She kept writing letters though, hoping that at least one of them will be replied to, even if it was an angry response. Sometimes she’d walk around the gardens of the new palace she resided to get some sense of familiarity. It was similar enough to the one back home that it made her feel a little closer to Alisa.

The last half of the week arrived and she was crowned the new Queen of Seijoh. 

That very same day, she received news of mercenaries raiding her home kingdom a few days after her departure, looting, pillaging and killing whoever was in their way as they ransacked the town. The Haiba’s were among the fallen and Miwa realized why her letters didn’t get a response. Tooru had to hold her hysteric figure that night, unable to choke back the cries that wrecked her body. Tobio had to stay an extra week for his safety, though the king and queen were safe and the kingdom was already in the process of healing, but Miwa’s grief had just begun. 

She often had nightmares in the beginning, always waking up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat, calling out Alisa’s name. She was plagued with what the attack must have been for her, like she was there, helplessly watching the one she loves get her life taken away. Tooru helped in any way he could, offering a shoulder to lean on, or simply just let her tears soak through his clothes. She appreciated it, of course, having someone be there for her at her lowest point, but it didn’t change the fact that she was never able to really tell Alisa that she loved her.

_“I just wanted you to know because I learned the hard way that some things need to be said before it’s too late.”_

Miwa learned now too, why it was important to say things before it was too late. 

After a few days, Tooru had gifted her a baby blue-dyed leather bound journal, telling her to write down whatever she felt like writing down, like things she wanted to tell Alisa, to tell herself, or anyone, really. He said it’d help her with the grief and shared that he did the same when both his parents had died in a shipwreck. 

For a while she didn’t use it. Simply opening it over her desk and stared at the blank page, not really knowing where to even begin. But eventually, she’d fill the pages. It became routine that she wrote something in it before she slept. While she wrote, she’d set the dagger Alisa had gifted her by her side as a reminder of who she was writing for. It became a bittersweet feeling and a dull ache in her heart whenever she’d reminisce on the memories of her. In such a short time, Alisa had imprinted herself in Miwa’s life as if she had always been there. 

As years went on, she wrote less and less, focusing on her duties as queen and eventually having children of her own. She and Tooru would tell their kids stories about their real loves, sharing the happiness they felt then with them. Miwa would even show them the journal that held the raw emotion she had felt and still feels. She passed the dagger down to her kids, making them promise to care for it and understand the significance of it and to pass it down to their own children and so forth. 

On her deathbed, she wrote on the last page of her journal one final time with a promise she intends to keep.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/SOUM4KI)


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